Across the Universe

Across the Universe is one of the worst films that I have seen in the theater in a long time. It is a mess of a movie.

The film follows a rag tag group of young people during the turbulent 60's. Our protagonist is a English lad named Jude. He goes to America to find his dad, but stays after meeting Max and his sister Lucy. Lucy and Jude are destined to be entwined in young love.

That's really the story. It is as thin as a paper cup and just as disposable and recyclable. Everyone who has seen a movie about the 60's has seen this plot or elements of the plot before. It tries to touch on everything - hippies, music, the civil rights movement, and the Vietnam War and the struggle of the "radicals'" protesting at home among every other instance of 60's nostalgia you can imagine.
The characters are also 60's stereotypes masquerading as memories.

The problem is the filmmakers love The Beatles (whose music makes up the entire musical's soundtrack) too much. The story exists because of the songs, not the other way around as it should be. The story is thin because it merely bides its time with a loose narrative as an excuse to fill time between musical interludes. Those small pieces of narrative cannot sustain the audience's interest, so the filmmakers chose to make the time in between songs short and forgettable so we can push right on through to the next number.

Some of the musical pieces serve as bold interpretations of The Beatles musical catalogue and contain interesting images, but most stick out like sore thumbs in the context of the narrative. A few of the musical numbers did stand out as quality pieces of filmmaking including "Let it Be" during race riots, "Strawberry Fields Forever" in a Vietnam and artist freak out montage, "Across the Universe" on a subway car, and "Because" lying in a field of tall grass.

Still, the film has no subtlety in its purpose: to use as many Beatles songs as possible. That means having characters named Jude, Lucy, and Prudence. Max might as well been named "Eleanor Rigby" to keep the trend going.

Certain things bothered me above all. There was use of a heightened reality common to film musicals, but that was no excuse for a lifeless and bland film in the midst of all the vain attempts to shower the audience with vibrant life. I have never seen a better example of style over substance.

Another annoyance was the love story. I could not be invested in the two lovers' fates at all. Perhaps I have been spoiled by the recent indie musical Once with its wonderful characters and lovely love story. The big deal is that the love story is really the meat and potatoes of the narrative. If I could not care about the love story, I was doomed to not care about the whole movie.

The film did manage to find some level of balance and relative skill in the third act, but by then it was too late. I was turned off by the movie early on and had no hope for reinvestment.

*1/2

The Perfect Score

Ah, the SATs. How can a group of teens with different dreams for the future band together to steal the answers and beat the system? Humorlessly.

I caught this movie Friday night on TBS. I should have gone to bed. Somehow I excuse myself from putting the movies I watch on late nights on the weekend through the same standard set I employ during the week. I'll sit through much worse films at 2 am on a Saturday morning than I would at 7:15 pm on Friday night. And I don't know why. It's almost always a mistake.

One such mistake was watching The Perfect Score. It had a lot going for it. Scarlett Johanson (who has been good in movies such as Lost in Translation, Ghost World, and Match Point), Erika Christensen (who was good in Traffic), and Chris Evans (who surprised me with solid work in Sunshine) all have major roles. Well, okay. That's pretty much all it had going for it.

The scheme is lame and would never work, not even in my wildest dreams. The cast of misfits and popular kids never gel as a acting team. In fact, three of the performers should be ashamed of their performances in the film. Bryan Greenburg, Darius Miles (who, granted, is not a professional actor), and Leonardo Nam are awful. Everyone else is bad, but Greenburg, Miles, and Nam are truly awful. Nam in particular is all bravado and hi-yucks as the stoner of the crew. He sets the tone for the movie. Any easy joke available will be made. The movie is as smart as a stoner in the middle of a long day of bong-induced pleasure.

Even though the movie hints at the desire to look at the complexity of those high school-types that we know all too well, it fails. Everyone ends up being the sum of what we already know about them. Even as the characters change near the end (which they do all at the same time oddly enough), they still remain the products of the writers' memories of high school and certainly movies set in high school (they reference The Breakfast Club). But rather than exploring teenagers through in-depth conversation as in TBC (except maybe a few on rooftops or in the woods), we learn of these students' "complexities" through this hair-brained scheme.

Ah, the scheme. Even though the writers' put forth a lot of effort into making the heist of the answers exciting with close calls, alarms, and setbacks, I was bored. When they decide to steal the questions and complete the test as a team after a setback, I cringed. They'll beat the system by taking the test? Yahoo!

And you know some of these teens have to hook up! It wouldn't be a teen movie if nobody kissed or tightly embraced each other. Even The Breakfast Club fall into that mold.

Do they take their team answers and "cheat" on the test? Do they realize their dreams? Does anyone care? Not me.

P.S. - this movie is the perfect example of the misuse of voice over...

*1/2

Fail Safe (2000)

I imagine that the LIVE factor of the broadcast was meant to add excitement and gain viewers who were eager to see if their favorite stars would mess up right before their eyes. It didn't work. Even with a premise that lends itself to great human drama and emotion, the film is lifeless. Exposition early in the film is necessary but dull and awkward. The film incorporates interesting camera work, providing a technical acheivement for a LIVE telecast. But remarkable technical achievements can't save the actors from muddling through their lines. Wonderful actors like Don Cheadle, Harvey Keitel, and James Cromwell among others don't seem to take well to the confines of LIVE television. Particularly Keitel has trouble making his lines feel alive and of the moment.

The story is interesting enough. I could use a little less of the right-on-the-nose dialogue explaining the situation over and over. Subtlety is thrown to the wolves. Emotion would have been welcome, but it is largely absent from the production. I must admit that I was bored for most of the film's duration.

*1/2

The Matrix: Revolutions

I found this old review I did for The Matrix: Revolutions on my old site, and it still holds true to my feelings today. I know it's long, but the rantings of a mad man tend to be.



"The Matrix: Revolutions spoils the achievements of the first two films in the franchise and squanders potential that few films could rival.
The first film could stand alone as its own film, but the promises of more amazing special effects and complex storytelling was enough to get audiences salivating for more. Rarely have audiences been so thrilled as they were by the combination of action, philosophy, science fiction, and a new breed of special effects that would spawn a new generation of copycat filmmakers.
The Matrix: Reloaded was a film overwhelmed with constant action set pieces. The action soon overcame the storytelling to dominate the film. Still, it took the movie goer back to that same unchartered territory that the first film introduced us to. It also contained the single best car chase that I have ever witnessed, an eighteen minute action extravaganza peaking with a martial arts fight on a moving semi. The film also promised better things to come, signified with its "to be continued"-like ending that had audiences divided.
I loved Reloaded for a good long while. It had produced adrenaline in my body like no other film has. The thrill ride was constant and exhilerating. Then the third film, The Matrix: Revolutions, surfaced.
I could ignore the negative musing of fans after seeing the second film because I knew that film served as a second chapter in a three chapter story. They would soon see how necessary Reloaded was in order to bring about the end of the series. I have to say, crow never tasted this bad before.
The Matrix: Revolutions is a terribly disappointing piece of work. Repetition and missteps by the directors and writers, the Wachowski brothers, ended up sinking the franchise.
Where Reloaded left off, Neo was stuck in a coma, existing somewhere between the matrix and the machine world. Bane, who had been assimilated by Agent Smith, had tripped an EMP that rendered a whole series of ships defenseless against an onslaught of sentinals. Meanwhile, sentinals approached Zion and there were preparations being made to protect it. Neo had found out that he was only one of a whole series of Ones, but he chose to follow a dangerous path when he went into the matrix to save Trinity.
The story set up for Revolutions had great potential. Sadly, that potential was never realized. Instead, the Wachowskis gave us another excuse to dislike sequels.
Two main problems surfaced in the last film that ultimately proved to be more than it could overcome.
1) Agent Smith became a cartoon. He soon only delivered slow, drawn out syllables for catch phrases and neurotic exposition. He no longer was menacing as he so ably was in the first film. The second film hinted at the direction the character would eventually follow, but I never expected it to get so bad.
2) Elementary storytelling became the means of exposition most often used. Things created in the first film, such as the familiar "come and get it" motion of the hand by Morpheus and Neo, resurface again in the final film. It doesn't take a brilliant storyteller to reincorporate story elements that he or she created. But doing so in such a flashy, knowing manner shows little insight into how to finish an epic storyline.
The final battle between Neo and Agent Smith seemd entirely stale because it had been done better and without noticable effort in the first two films. By Revolutions, the battle seemd old and boring by comparison to the other excellent fights we were treated to in the first two films. While I watched Neo and Agent Smith repeatedly run into or punch each other, thus creating massive shock waves, I couldn't help but ask myself, "Is this what I've been waiting for? Is this the climax the other films deserve?" The answers ended up being "no" and "no."
The film managed to take the three lead characters and make them completely boring. The actors and actress who played them must have sensed this because they seem to be sleepwalking through their parts.
Morpheus used to be a Yoda with attitude. Then he was just a stock character left to experience some minor story devices. Gone was his enigmatic qualities evidenced in the first two films. In its place was someone we knew everything about and didn't care to know anymore of.
He was my favorite character of the series, but Revolutions gives him nothing to work with. Even when his dream is realized, when he experiences something he has longed anf fought for, he's not flush with unsurmountable joy like I would have expected. He merely strolls through his final scenes like the office dullard.
Morpheus has become a pawn whereas he had started as a King or at least a Knight on the Wachowski chess board.
Trinity is now only a love interest who serves the purpose of giving Neo some dramatic moments. She was very much a simple character in Reloaded as well, but I could not have predicted how one-note she would end up. The saucy, leatherclad Trinity who got some mojos working in the first film saw her quality disipate in the second film. In the third film, she's just there. Everything that she's supposed to be struggling for comes easy. Either it comes too fast or not fast enough. That trait is one she shares with the entire film.
Neo was a prototype hero for the ages. How could you not root for him? He was going to save an entire nation. He was going to "free our minds." Then he became a pathetic pawn, used as a game piece by the machines and the mysterious Oracle and Architect. You stop caring about him about the point in the movie when he no longer commands sympathy.
A major player in the Matrix world loses his or her life, but what should be a shattering event soon becomes a unbelievably lengthy monologue delivered with soap opera panache. It was the beginning of the end, but I was already done with it.
That having been said, the film does contain high-quality special effects. But I don't see movies for great special effects. I want the whole package, a movie that is good from A to Z. Revolutions made the series stop somewhere between I and O. Go figure.

**"

Alien Resurrection

Alien Resurrection, thou hast failed. Oh, boy, thou really hast failed. This movie is ridiculous – how does Ripley show off her new found hyrid abilities? Through a round of tough gal basketball tricks of course. Not just basketball, but basketball on a court on a spaceship...in the future...with Ron Perlman...who's a space pirate. Tah-dah! Thou stinks.

I had some hope for the movie even though I had heard it was bad. Joss Whedon wrote it. I liked both Buffy and Firefly. I certainly love his work on the Astonishing X-Men comic title. But his script sucks. Or maybe the acting sucks. Methinks both suck. Immensely.

Perlman fails to be a believable human being once again. I hadn't noticed how awkward Winona Ryder can be at times, but that is on display during her performance in Alien Resurrection. I like her, but I'm starting to think she isn't the strong talent I once thought she was. More charisma than talent, perhaps. Weaver is laughable the whole time, the tough woman shtick is old and tired in Alien Resurrection, mostly because the dialogue is so bad. But Weaver doesn't exactly rise above her lines either.

It was the least exciting “exciting” movie I have seen in a long time. It did succeed at being really gross, though. Way to go, lackluster movie. All the crunching, slimy, exhaling wheezing made me cringe as usual when watching an Alien movie. But the thrill was gone. In its place was a mistake of a movie masquerading as entertainment. “Boo!” I say, sir. “Boo!”

*1/2

Wings of Desire

This film is beautiful to look at. It is also boring as all get out. I tried very hard to give the film time to develop, to get better and bring my attention back. It barely happened during the film's final twenty minutes or so. All that preceded it was philosophical posing. The film would have made a better short or work of fictional literature. On screen, it merely is a chore. I had to make myself sit through it. Again, the cinematography is gorgeous, but the story (thin as it is, which can be okay, but wasn't) didn't earn my time. I did watch the making of doc on the DVD, and it allowed me to have some respect for what they were attempting to do. But the idea wasn't translated into a very good film. Shorter might have equaled better, but I'll never know. I sat on my bed watching, giving time limits for the film - "It's been a long time. Nothing's really happened. It'll end soon." "I was wrong last time. But it has to end soon. Nothing has changed." "Dear Lord, help me. Finish it."

Maybe one day I will give it another chance. Someday far off in the future. You can't even see it from here.

**